TO BE A MOM
No matter what your beliefs are around creation: God, The Universe, an alternate deity or deities, aliens (no judgment), the bottom line is that ‘The Mother’ is too a creator of life, and worthy of equal or greater worship.
I always thought of Mother’s Day as a Hallmark holiday, you know what I mean? Over commercialized way to sell cheesy cards full of mushy quotes, flowers and ridiculous trinkets that do nothing more than collect dust. I now realize, albeit still over commercialized and cheesy, this is actually also a day of celebration, reflection, hope and gratitude.
I have always seen my own mother through the lens of utmost respect and love. She is my best friend, confidant, and lives high up on a pedestal in my world. It is pretty challenging to have a saint for a mother and view her any other way. Mind you, I may not have always expressed this gratitude with such grace. Stay tuned for, ‘Confessions of a Teenage Drama Queen’ for details on that. Appreciation was always present even if I had a funny way of showing it. This powerhouse spent half her adult life doubling as a personal chauffeur (driving me to airports and castings), chef, therapist, teacher and protector. However, it was only upon entrance into this madness called motherhood that I truly understood the value and profound impact this woman has had on my life.
I know not all may be as fortunate as I am to have this kind of relationship with their mother. I also know that not everyone that reads this may be a mother yet or ever want to be one so I will graciously accept eye rolls. Lastly, I know this day (Mother’s Day) is not without challenges for some who maybe have lost a mother, mother figure or worse, a child. This post is not to rub salt in any wounds but simply to publically announce my deepest gratitude and appreciation for my mother and in turn the same to my boys for making me a mother (Hubs included).
When I was four years old, before logic and reason were part of my psyche, I asked my parents to bring me siblings (you know, pick up a few at the grocery store) this was not biologically possible for my mother but that did not stop her, she went above and beyond and brought me dozens through her new role as Foster Mom. This woman, the one who lost her ability to procreate while bringing me into this world, was now saving the lives of so many. Her selfless soul has been an incredible inspiration and truly molded me into the woman and mama I am today. I cannot think of a more important message then a tribute to not only my own amazing mama but all of the mamas out there keeping tiny humans alive. Today we celebrate and worship you, we celebrate us.
Life is such a journey, such an adventure. In the past five years, I went from being a single, downtown party girl, condo dweller, globetrotter, fashionista to a mom of three amazing little boys, and a wife. One of my favorite parts of this voyage was watching my own mother become a grandmother. There is no greater ear candy than to hear the words “gramma, gramma” on repeat, eject from the mouths of your own spawn. The greatest benefit of all is the pure joy this brings to her, Grandma is her favorite title yet, I’m sure of that.
The most commonly asked question the days leading to Mother’s Day is “what do you want?” Bless the hearts of children all over making handmade cards and gifts. I think I can respond for all of my fellow mamas out there, that the answer to that question is acknowledgment. Your kids’ art will go into the forever collection vault, flowers are beautiful, a massage and breakfast in bed are obviously lovely gestures and certain to gain you brownie points but all we ever want is reassurance that we are doing a good job, that we are loved and appreciated. That you, my child, feel loved in return and that I am inspiring you the way your Grandma did me.
Motherhood is the only full-time job that does not pay a cent, does not reward you promotions, vacations or even sick days. There is no training program or instruction manual explaining protocols, it is a trial by error endeavor that involves the lives of little people. There is nothing more stressful and worrisome yet ultimately and simultaneously rewarding. At the very least this parenting thing is a rollercoaster, clusterf*$k that gets more exciting and terrifying with every loop-de-loop! My heart has never raced so hard with both panic and love.
So, while some days are messy and others messier. I hope all of you mamas, foster mamas, step-mamas, fur-mamas and mamas-to-be take this day to reflect and realize what an incredible job you are doing. Through my personal reflection I have realized that while motherhood is full of challenges, massive sacrifices, and all-encompassing, changing-by-the-minute emotions, I also know that every day I am blessed to have all of it. Grateful for my tribe.
Sabrina Greer is a best-selling coauthor on the popular Dear Women Guidebook series, mommy-blogger, connector of inspiring souls, and outnumbered mama to three amazing boys. Her studies in developmental psychology and education have served her well in motherhood, her career, and life. Sabrina has become a pro at embracing the chaos and strives to live out her days coaching others to do the same. She is passionate about empowering young girls, women, and fellow mamas through her writing, volunteer work, and philanthropic endeavors while educating young boys (hers especially) to do the same.